


Life Savings

by Uytob



Category: SpongeBob SquarePants (Cartoon)
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-01
Updated: 2019-12-01
Packaged: 2021-02-18 02:50:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,180
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21637165
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Uytob/pseuds/Uytob
Summary: An impulse gift initially bought for Mr. Krabs's darling daughter becomes an obsession of his and he decides to take it for his own.
Comments: 1
Kudos: 2





	Life Savings

Mr. Krabs was… alone. He hadn’t had a partner in almost a decade, and his urges were becoming too intense to neglect any longer. Lacking the proper manual organs, Eugene was ultimately unable to satisfy himself without the risk of accidentally cleaving his meaty package in the process. Because of this, he had adopted the habit of anal masturbation. He had been at it for years; steadily increasing the size of his objects of insertion.

This leads to today. Mr. Krabs had just received a mail order in the largest package imaginable. The box containing his treasure had taken up the entirety of the delivery truck. Krabs watched anxiously as three mailfish used lubricant and an oversized crowbar to gently tease the delivery from their considerably overtaxed vehicle. It was finally extricated with a loud, wet,

“SPLOP!”

The package thudded on the sand, shaking the sea floor violently within a 2.4 mile radius. After the delivery, Krabs could swear he saw the uncanny look of pure relief in the visage of the automobile’s headlights and grill. He smirked as he knew he would soon have the very same look on his own face.

“Much appreciated, laddies!” Eugene bellowed to the underpaid mailfish. “I’d say you’ve earned a tip! Arr har har har!” Mr. Krabs held out a crisp $100 bill to the nearest worker, who appeared to have de-aged by about 20 years upon seeing the money.

“Neptune bless you sir! Have a wonderful day!”

Then, after the truck had driven a decent bit away, Krabs pulled a fishing rod from his back pocket. He reeled and jerked it with an intense concentration. Soon, his reward arrived: his $100 along with the man’s wallet. “I didn’t say the tip was for you!” he jeered. Other than the $100, the wallet contained two single dollar bills, a driver’s license, a library card, a picture of an unattractive woman, and two condoms. Krabs grinned in delight as he snatched the money, before engaging the full strength of his big, meaty claws to hurl the chunk of fake leather into the trench just outside of Bikini Bottom.

Krabs sat in his study, fireplace roaring, his first dollar ever earned framed beside his millionth dollar. The musk of minted tender wafted from his personal vault. His safe door was ajar, and he held a sizable portion of the contents in his claws; coins. Dozens of laterally ridged, pebble-sized metal discs lay in his grasp, and he gazed at them with an intense lust.

He was nude, lounging in his time-worn seat, and buttered up for the occasion. He moved slowly, despite being capable of withstanding rapid fire. He wished to drag out every ounce of pleasure from the act. In his claw, he held a single penny. Eyes half lidded and saliva cascading from his lips, he traced the circumference of his round, puffy hole with the miniscule, rust-colored unit of currency. To others, this coin was essentially valueless, but in this moment, it was Eugene’s entire world. His circling ceased and was immediately followed by a meager deposit of $0.01.

He slowly inserted coin after coin, until all three dozen were safely secured within his bowels. During this, his eyes hungrily traced the contents of his delivery. It was a massive and formidable beast, one that he had long wanted to tame. As he took in the sight of the expertly handcrafted, hyper-realistic, blue whale penis, his crabby cock pulsated and dribbled with frothy precum. His dick was fat, stubby, and covered with jagged spines, closely resembling a barrel cactus. Krabs was well-acquainted with genital mutilation, and his cock was utterly riddled with scars, ranging from dangling flaps of flesh to large indents. Most notably, Eugene’s piercings with a cheap, unsanitary metal rod had resulted in 8 pseudo-urethras along the sides of his penis; some still crusty with partially healed skin. Two were very recent additions, and, though no longer bleeding, had a fair amount of caked-on dried blood surrounding them. Every one of these apertures was bubbling as precum dribbled from them, making it appear as though Mr. Krabs had a cactus taking a bubble bath at the base of his torso.

With everything now in place, he heaved himself from his lounge chair and stepped up to the ladder standing beside the towering toy. He giggled with delight as the small pieces of metal within him jingled softly. The time for fun and games had past, however, and he stared determinedly at the monolith before him. Prior to scaling the ladder and taking on the beast, he scooped his claw into a massive tub of butter, slathering the improvised lubricant generously on the oft abused opening that rested within his bountiful derriere. Freshly buttered, Krabs scaled the ladder, standing on top and taking aim on his target.

With a confident grunt, he leaped from the ladder and landed with precision on the tapered tip of the dildo. His weight, along with the copious amounts of butter, caused him to rapidly take in approximately a quarter of the whale dong. For anyone else, this would have been certain death. But experienced as he was, Krabs sat comfortably on his throne. Though comfortable indeed, Krabs still wanted more. With a great downward heave, he had plunged himself downward to the halfway point, causing his stomach to distend outward from the massive foreign object invading his digestive system.

A barrier was broken. he began sinking. The change he had so gingerly inserted had, along with whatever else was present within his bowels, been pushed into his stomach. He was the definition of depravity: a swollen, moaning piggy bank impaled by the most ludicrous penis nature has to offer. His cock squirted in all directions like a badly damaged fire hose. Slowly, he slid down the pole, no doubt irreparably damaging his innards. But Krabs didn’t care.

Already he had come harder than ever before. His cock, like a high-end garden sprinkler, had strewn his gooey seed with vigor evenly about his study. He was approaching utter impalement. The coins in his stomach were elevated up into his esophagus and casually into his expectant maw. He suddenly slipped once more, as his myriad of leaking fluids had thoroughly lubricated the dildo and his anal lips finally kissed the base. The tip had launched his change out in a glorious shower; his prior deposit becoming a withdrawal.

He came continuously out his freakish mutant cactus cock, while the silicone monster asphyxiated him from the inside. He knew this would happen of course. Eugene had yearned for the sweet release of death for **_years_** _._ Finally, he would be able to go out the way he had always wanted: death by penis.

As he slipped into the afterlife, still grinding on the titan impaling him, he came one final time. An orgasm to end all orgasms. His dick exploded, blasting the room with a thick coat of pink paint. The fireplace was extinguished. His body now vacant of any liquids, he was left an empty shell.


End file.
